Overscheduled Families

March 15, 2006 Consequences of Overscheduled Families Children need down time. Yet, many have such hectic schedules they have difficulty doing any task exceptionally well. Parents are anxious for the child to get scholarships or be accepted at the best schools. Students feel extra pressure to do well academically and become "well-rounded" by participating in as many activities as possible. For athletically gifted children, the lure of potential sports scholarships can be very enticing to parents and children. Some parents are certain if a child works hard and practices enough, he/she will become a famous athlete and obtain a multi-million dollar contract. The pressure to perform and the lack of down time to relax or play can take a toll on a child. Some children experience anxiety, depression or withdrawal. Children may develop physical symptoms, like headaches or stomach aches. A child may also refuse to go to school or participate in a scheduled activity. In fact, overscheduling can cause problems among everyone in the family. Restoring Balance Families can take steps to restore a little more balance between work, activities, playtime and family time. Experts have several tips to help families reduce their hectic schedules. Limit each child to one activity. This is especially important for families with more than one child. Encourage a child to pick an activity he/she likes. Dont assume a child loves a sport just because a parent previously participated in the same sport. Some parents live out their own dreams through their children. Remember - a child may not share the same passions and interests - and may not necessarily have the same abilities. Find out how much commitment an activity requires before signing up. Some sports teams practice several days a week with games or competitions on weekends. That adds up to a lot of travel time. Aim to eat more meals as a family. Have the children help out with meal selection, preparation and clean-up. That gives them a sense of responsibility and increases the amount of time spent with family. Reserve time just for family events. Play games, watch a movie or go for a walk in the park. Everyone, including busy moms and dads, will benefit from some relaxation. AUDIENCE INQUIRY For information on stress and scheduling demands on teens and the family: American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, http://www.aacap.org National Mental Health Association, http://www.nmha.org Putting Families First, http://www.puttingfamilyfirst.org BIBLIOGRAPHY Barrett, A., and R. Turner, "Family Structure and Mental Health," Journal of Health and Social Behavior, June 2005, Vol. 46, No. 2, pp. 156-169. Bolino, M., and W. Turnley, "The Personal Costs of Citizenship Behavior," Journal of Applied Psychology, July 2005, Vol. 90, No. 4, pp. 740-748. Doherty, William, "Overscheduled Kids, Underconnected Families," Greenfield: Putting Families First, downloaded from website (http://www.puttingfamilyfirst.org), February 15, 2006. "Helping Teenagers with Stress," Washington, DC: American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, downloaded from website (http://www.aacap.org), February 15, 2006. Lee-Baggley, D., et al., "Coping with Interpersonal Stress," Journal of Personality, October 2005, Vol. 73, No. 5, pp. 1141-1180. "Overscheduled Kids," Greenfield: Putting Families First, downloaded from website (http://www.puttingfamilyfirst.org), February 15, 2006. Ryan, Nancy, et al., "Changes in Childrens Stressors Over the Past 30 Years," Pediatric Nursing, July-August 2005, Vol. 31, No. 4, pp. 282-291. "Tips for the Overscheduled Family," Alexandria: National Mental Health Association, downloaded from website (http://www.nmha.org), February 15, 2006. Research compiled and edited by Barbara J. Fister